TROMBONE-L Digest 1788 Topics covered in this issue include: 1) A guy and his octopus - small trombone content (mandatory) by "Dean McCarty" 2) Re: tractor love by sabutin@mindspring.com 3) Re: Inner - outer slides by "Dave Mackey" 4) Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? by Timothy Richardson 5) Re: repair advice wanted - repair class advice by Timothy Richardson 6) Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? by "Jeff Albert" 7) Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? by "Tom Izzo" 8) RE: Searching for Paul Uy Bass Trombone Concerto by Steve Gamble 9) Re: repair advice wanted by Closetbn@aol.com 10) Wagner humor by Angie Brunk 11) Re: Wagner humor by Jay Heltzer 12) Re: A guy and his octopus - small trombone content (mandatory) by "Art Triggs" 13) Var's on Magic Flute? by "Aaron Roth" 14) Re: tractor love by "Adrian Drover" From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 07:29:10 -0500 From: "Dean McCarty" To: "Trombones and related issues forum" Subject: A guy and his octopus - small trombone content (mandatory) Message-ID: <001101c00f59$3db434a0$80c12bcf@compaqcomputer> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_000E_01C00F2F.53A0CAA0"

A guy walks into a bar with an octopus on his shoulder. He sets the octopus down on the bar and announces: "I'll give anyone fifty dollars who can give this octopus a musical instrument that he can't play. If he plays it, you give me $50".

A guy in the back comes forward with an acoustic guitar, hands it to the octopus who proceeds to tune the strings and play a beautiful Spanish ballad. The guy gives the octopus' owner $50.

Next, a guy comes forward with a trombone. The octopus takes it, sprays the slide, and cuts loose with an up-beat jazzy J.J. Johnson number. Another $50 dollars is laid on the bar.

The bartender comes from behind the bar and goes into a back room. He comes out with a bagpipe. He tells the guy he'll bet him an extra $50 that the octopus can't play a bagpipe. The octopus picks it up and turns it over and over, upside down & every-which-way.

After about five minutes, the bartender asks,"Well, is he going to play it or what?"
To which the octopus replies, "Play it ? Hell, I'm trying to figure out how to get her pajamas off."

Couldn't pass this one up...

Dean McCarty

freelance trombonist, Houston area

From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 08:58:46 -0400 From: sabutin@mindspring.com To: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Re: tractor love Message-ID: <200008261300.JAA23080@maynard.mail.mindspring.net> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" At 10:59 PM 8/25/00 -0500, you wrote: >At 9:37 AM -0700 8/25/00, Timothy Richardson wrote: >>Although I live in Virginia now, I grew up in Wisconsin and admit to >>having played quite a few polkas. Polkas of course are just as full >>of sexual innuendo, but it is much more cleverly disguised. You >>have to dig for it a little. Midwesterners don't mind, it's too >>cold to do anything else most of the year. > > You're kiddingn right? I can't think of anything *less* sexy >than Polka. >-- >Angie Brunk ===================== 50 million Poles can't be wrong...if they WERE, there wouldn't BE 50 million Poles. S. >MLS Indiana University School of Library and Information Science 1999 >"As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man >objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever."--Clarence >Darrow > From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 09:20:10 -0400 From: "Dave Mackey" To: "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: Inner - outer slides Message-ID: <001701c00f60$5d45b3a0$6943c7d0@DaveMackey> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit > Most slides are not correctly built, because it take a lot of time and > measuring with micrometers by an experienced tech to get it all right. > Merely bending unparallel slide tubes will never make it really good. Even so, there are other factors that affect the playability of the horn. My poor little King 3B was looked at by the slide techs at the last ETW, and I was told it's suffering from a case of terminal slide warpage and the slide is eventually going to need to be replaced. It's a shame, too because the horn is only 21 years old. It's the horn I use for my Big Band work. Dave Mackey Trombone 2 Brass Tacks Big Band Manahwakin, NJ From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: 26 Aug 2000 07:39:12 -0700 From: Timothy Richardson To: Closetbn@aol.com Cc: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? Message-ID: <20000826143912.2978.cpmta@c012.sfo.cp.net> Content-Type: text/plain Content-Disposition: inline Mime-Version: 1.0 I wonder if it would be better to glue than solder? I have heard that incredible advances have been made in adhesives. I admit I know absolutely nothing about them. I've used the traditional ones for gluing woodwork or PVC pipe on occasion. You need strength, sealing air tight, and removability. The advantage I see would be longer setup time, less skill required, and less cosmetic touchup later. The superglues and epoxies are certainly strong enough but I think they are permanent, and I guess you always have to be prepared to take a horn apart again. Anybody experimented? yours, tim richardson On Fri, 25 August 2000, Closetbn@aol.com wrote: > > Does anyone out there know about instrument repair? I have an old horn that > is in pieces, and I thought it would be fun to try to put it back together. > It's a pretty worthless horn, so the risk would be low. If anyone has any > really basic tips on doing that kind of thing, or could point me towards a > good source, I'd appreciate it. Just for starters, what is the right kind of > soldier to use? > > Thanks. _______________________________________________________________________ Free Unlimited Internet Access! Try it now! http://www.zdnet.com/downloads/altavista/index.html _______________________________________________________________________ From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: 26 Aug 2000 07:49:00 -0700 From: Timothy Richardson Cc: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Re: repair advice wanted - repair class advice Message-ID: <20000826144900.3329.cpmta@c012.sfo.cp.net> Content-Type: text/plain Content-Disposition: inline Mime-Version: 1.0 And one more thing, (we call this an "alibi" where I work) there have been several comments recently about learning instrument repairs. Though there are few courses around, except for a couple of big places like Red Wing, some of the skills can be learned in art class. This is a suggestion from several people on the MIMF forum forum, who have taken jewelry making classes to learn more about metal working and various types of soldering, polishing, finishing, etc. Apparently many jewelry making skills directly trnasfer to instrument repair. A lot of places will have community college or voc tech short courses in jewlery making, at least a lot more than will teach instrument repair. Might be worth a try. yours, tim richardson On Sat, 26 August 2000, Timothy Richardson wrote: > > I wonder if it would be better to glue than solder? I have heard that incredible advances have been made in adhesives. I admit I know absolutely nothing about them. I've used the traditional ones for gluing woodwork or PVC pipe on occasion. You need strength, sealing air tight, and removability. The advantage I see would be longer setup time, less skill required, and less cosmetic touchup later. The superglues and epoxies are certainly strong enough but I think they are permanent, and I guess you always have to be prepared to take a horn apart again. > > Anybody experimented? > yours, > tim richardson > > > On Fri, 25 August 2000, Closetbn@aol.com wrote: > > > > > Does anyone out there know about instrument repair? I have an old horn that > > is in pieces, and I thought it would be fun to try to put it back together. > > It's a pretty worthless horn, so the risk would be low. If anyone has any > > really basic tips on doing that kind of thing, or could point me towards a > > good source, I'd appreciate it. Just for starters, what is the right kind of > > soldier to use? > > > > Thanks. > > > _______________________________________________________________________ > > Free Unlimited Internet Access! Try it now! > http://www.zdnet.com/downloads/altavista/index.html > > _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ Free Unlimited Internet Access! Try it now! http://www.zdnet.com/downloads/altavista/index.html _______________________________________________________________________ From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 10:18:42 -0500 From: "Jeff Albert" To: , "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? Message-ID: <000b01c00f70$ec94c360$0cd64fd8@default> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit I think the advantage of solder over glue is adjustability rather than just removability. Solder can be reheated for minor adjustments, with out disassembling the join, and reapplying. Jeff Albert www.jeffalbert.com ----- Original Message ----- From: "Timothy Richardson" To: "Trombones and related issues forum." Sent: Saturday, August 26, 2000 9:39 AM Subject: Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? > I wonder if it would be better to glue than solder? I have heard that incredible advances have been made in adhesives. I admit I know absolutely nothing about them. I've used the traditional ones for gluing woodwork or PVC pipe on occasion. You need strength, sealing air tight, and removability. The advantage I see would be longer setup time, less skill required, and less cosmetic touchup later. The superglues and epoxies are certainly strong enough but I think they are permanent, and I guess you always have to be prepared to take a horn apart again. > > Anybody experimented? > yours, > tim richardson > > > On Fri, 25 August 2000, Closetbn@aol.com wrote: > > > > > Does anyone out there know about instrument repair? I have an old horn that > > is in pieces, and I thought it would be fun to try to put it back together. > > It's a pretty worthless horn, so the risk would be low. If anyone has any > > really basic tips on doing that kind of thing, or could point me towards a > > good source, I'd appreciate it. Just for starters, what is the right kind of > > soldier to use? > > > > Thanks. > > > _______________________________________________________________________ > > Free Unlimited Internet Access! Try it now! > http://www.zdnet.com/downloads/altavista/index.html > > _______________________________________________________________________ > > From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 11:35:05 -0500 From: "Tom Izzo" To: , "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: repair advice wanted - maybe you could glue it??? Message-ID: <002d01c00f7b$981e71e0$1975dfd0@oemcomputer> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit ----- Original Message ----- From: Timothy Richardson >cosmetic touchup later. The superglues and epoxies are certainly strong enough but I think they are permanent, and I guess >you always have to be prepared to take a horn apart again. > There ARE antidotes for superglues & epoxies. The ONLY thing permanent really, is change. Tom From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 09:00:54 -0700 From: Steve Gamble To: "'David Blauer'" Cc: "Trombone List (E-mail)" Subject: RE: Searching for Paul Uy Bass Trombone Concerto Message-ID: <01C00F3C.28151AA0.orchpers@azstarnet.com> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Check out http://www.ascap.com and http://www.bmi.com Steve Gamble -----Original Message----- From: David Blauer [SMTP:faruke42@hotmail.com] Sent: Friday, August 25, 2000 3:36 PM To: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Searching for Paul Uy Bass Trombone Concerto Hello all, I thought to come to the list first with my query. I am seraching for any leads to finding the Concerto for Bass Trombone and Orchestra by Paul Uy. Paul used to be the director of music for the Radio-Television of Belgium (RTB). WHile there he also was the director of the Orchestra de Chambre de l'RTB. His name was shortened on the Concerto due to spelling and and pronounciation and whatnot. His full name is Paul Uytrebrouck. Any leads on finding him or the piece itself would be greatly appreciated. Thanks David BLauer ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 17:39:13 EDT From: Closetbn@aol.com To: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Re: repair advice wanted Message-ID: <25.a1bd207.26d99301@aol.com> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Oops, that was a typo. I really do know how to spell that. << << what is the right kind of soldier to use? >> All of our military branches would be up to the task! ~hary >> From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 15:40:26 -0500 From: Angie Brunk To: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Wagner humor Message-ID: Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" ; format="flowed" I thought this might fit in with our recent discussion of song lyrics. Any additional verses? >I have a ditty that is set to Wagner's "Flight of the Valkyeries". It >goes: > >We ride through the night skies >Flashing our large thighs >Picking up dead guys >You call this a job? > >You get the blonde one >I'll get the redhead >Hey, he's not dead yet! >Just wait.... >Aaaaagh! > >Those are the only two verses so far. Any additions? -- Angie Brunk MLS Indiana University School of Library and Information Science 1999 "As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever."--Clarence Darrow From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 17:22:35 -0500 From: Jay Heltzer To: angie@cybersolvers.com Cc: "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: Wagner humor Message-ID: <39A84328.F60BA14B@earthlink.net> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii; x-mac-type="54455854"; x-mac-creator="4D4F5353" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Angie Brunk wrote: > I thought this might fit in with our recent discussion of > song lyrics. Any additional verses? > > >I have a ditty that is set to Wagner's "Flight of the Valkyeries". It > >goes: > > > >We ride through the night skies > >Flashing our large thighs > >Picking up dead guys > >You call this a job? > > > >You get the blonde one > >I'll get the redhead > >Hey, he's not dead yet! > >Just wait.... > >Aaaaagh! > > > >Those are the only two verses so far. Any additions? Oy! That is a good one. I love to write lyrics to our zerps, but for some reason, i have not come up with words to our most frequently "sung" one. This summer, some friends at the festival i was at talked about publishing a book of excerpt lyrics that music students wrote to our appropriate excerpts. Based on most of our non-repressive minds, they were based on genital length, violent cursing anger, and other negative things, but they were funny as hell! I would love to share some privately, for those who have some good ones to swap. Nothing worth cluttering up the list, but I got a few, and am always looking for more. Jay Heltzer From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sat, 26 Aug 2000 23:16:59 -0400 From: "Art Triggs" To: "Dean McCarty" , "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: A guy and his octopus - small trombone content (mandatory) Message-ID: <008c01c00fd5$440060a0$f6a315ac@bestweb.net> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit FINALLY someone found a use for a bagpipe......... ----- Original Message ----- From: Dean McCarty To: Trombones and related issues forum. Sent: Saturday, August 26, 2000 8:29 AM Subject: A guy and his octopus - small trombone content (mandatory) A guy walks into a bar with an octopus on his shoulder. He sets the octopus down on the bar and announces: "I'll give anyone fifty dollars who can give this octopus a musical instrument that he can't play. If he plays it, you give me $50". A guy in the back comes forward with an acoustic guitar, hands it to the octopus who proceeds to tune the strings and play a beautiful Spanish ballad. The guy gives the octopus' owner $50. Next, a guy comes forward with a trombone. The octopus takes it, sprays the slide, and cuts loose with an up-beat jazzy J.J. Johnson number. Another $50 dollars is laid on the bar. The bartender comes from behind the bar and goes into a back room. He comes out with a bagpipe. He tells the guy he'll bet him an extra $50 that the octopus can't play a bagpipe. The octopus picks it up and turns it over and over, upside down & every-which-way. After about five minutes, the bartender asks,"Well, is he going to play it or what?" To which the octopus replies, "Play it ? Hell, I'm trying to figure out how to get her pajamas off." Couldn't pass this one up... Dean McCarty freelance trombonist, Houston area From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sun, 27 Aug 2000 04:14:52 GMT From: "Aaron Roth" To: trombone-l@lists.missouri.edu Subject: Var's on Magic Flute? Message-ID: Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed To all: I've finally gotten around to playing a solo written before the turn of the 20th Century...but I can't find it. Beethoven's Variations on The Magic Flute exists in a couple of editions playable by the trombone: the original 'cello version and the Keith Brown International edition. Does anyone know where I can find either edition? I'd be happy with either one, but I might prefer the International edition if it's around. Thanks in advance to anyone who can tip me off on its location, as I have had no success so far. -Aaron Roth P.S. In EDT, I am now officially a happy 19 years of age. Good night! ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com From ???@??? Mon Aug 28 07:49:55 2000 Date: Sun, 27 Aug 2000 09:11:59 +0100 From: "Adrian Drover" To: "Sam Burtis" , "Trombones and related issues forum." Subject: Re: tractor love Message-ID: <003a01c00ffe$8b6d9ba0$4e98fc3e@v4v3j2> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit ----- Original Message ----- From: To: Trombones and related issues forum. Sent: Saturday, August 26, 2000 1:58 PM Subject: Re: tractor love > Angie wrote > >> You're kiddingn right? I can't think of anything *less* sexy >> than Polka. > 50 million Poles can't be wrong...if they WERE, there wouldn't BE 50 > million Poles. I've heard that there is a larger Polish population living in Chicago than there is in Warsaw. Does that mean they play more polkas in Chicago? A. Adrian Drover (ADIOS Scotland) Personal: adrian@adios.co.uk Business: studio@adios.co.uk http://www.adios.co.uk